Ok so I can see myself as a public speaker. Maybe even an author. I spend enough time talking and writing online posts. I even was telling myself I should become a motivational speaker before God started ordering my steps and dragging my life through the mud.
My struggle lately has been with the new idea that church is community and not where a pastor leads. This fact is not a problem although it is new. My problem started with well if I want to open my home to have church what happens if men want to attend? There are issues of safety and propriety having my home open to males.
After that there is the confusion about women in leadership, then there is the real fact that men need other men to grow and be discipled by. I feel like if I call what ever I do a church it should be able to minister to all who might come unto it.
I cannot however just call whatever I am planning to do a prayer meeting or a Bible study. I have seen the power that is released when God’s people come together.
Besides all these things there are other issues with having a group in my home. My cat for one, my daughter for another. I have no idea who I am called to specifically and who I can just minister to through external community.
I know there will be individuals who God bonds and knits my heart with. I also know and can feel the mission ministry and need is much, much bigger than that. Bigger than the list! When that thought hit me I began almost to panic. We could barely get that gathered.
If only I had a house or was in a church.
Would it be so very, very wrong to see about the spaces our school just vacated? lol