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Sunday, July 24, 2011

I Need A Parental Vacation

My daughter has just left the house and that is ok with me.

I have been feeling like a parent recently where I have to put up with non sense and lay down the law because that is what parenting is all about.

Oh I cannot wait for the homeschooling conference that will be here early next month. There will be some respite for teen parents I am sure.

I am teaching her as much as I am learning myself. As creatures we respect the authority that is held before us. Nothing much more or less. She says I am getting meaner. No I just know she has gotten older. The stakes are higher.

I have been telling her for years that as her mother I am watching and taking note of the things she does. Sometimes it seems I am being hard on her over something minor but when it has become a repeated habit or is part of a bigger trend that is the reason. Not just some mood swing or negative attitude I picked up for the day.

I was having another conversation some place else about teenagers and curfews that pulled something else up out of me. Anger about my childhood or young adult years. I can see Jesus but I can also see my mother LOOMING over me. What I can't see is my father and that is just as much a problem as anything else.

It took me about as long to realize this, as it did for my daughter to verbalize she was mad at me for the way her life is, my father neglected some of his duties which negatively affected my up bringing.

Where was he to reign in my mother and let me spread my wings a little??? Silent and unaware. sigh

Be ware when something seems so one sided especially relationship feelings. They really should be shared equally among the responsible or involved parties.

At least I am wearing a fun summer dress I got cheap for the season. Even painted our nails yesterday. I do not think there is a color of the rainbow we are not wearing between the two of us. LOL

I even still have brownies left over from Wednesday baking.

We were going to run errands but now I am home alone with the cat and she is off doing her community service hair braiding. She has a good heart that kid. She does hair and child care for free.

Her dad and I both ask...."Are you getting paid for this?" and she just looks at us like who what??? hahahahaha